Money management and finances in a relationship, a longer and dedicated relationship that is, is ESSENTIAL for romantic success. Surprise!!
by Dr. Carol Francis
If you are a spender of money more than a maker of money--your job is to be very respectful, conscientious and communicative about how you are spending your team's money. As the spender you can place horrible stress and dangerous complications on your relationship by overspending all for the "immediate" pleasures or spontaneously moments of fun. You also have to watch out for too much self-indulgence, too much generosity toward others and way too much emphasis on the moments of life when you might be on the verge of bankruptcy or an empty pocket. You likely don't think about emergencies, saving for retirement, saving for the future fun or just saving so that your partner can feel safe, security, protected from future complications. Also, realize that if the other partner is the primary earner, you might be expressing a major disrespect for all his/her efforts in the process of bringing the money in to the household or team. On the other hand, you are the spice of the moment and the "let's make things happen now" attitude that can energy the relationship that might be too stuck or too dry from routine and predictable safety. Strike a balance between you partner's need for security and planning for bills, retirement, emergencies and a comfortable buffer. Then gently save for those carefree spending moments that your partner needs as much as you.If you are the conserver or saver of the money for your team--you have the best of intentions to create security and a future resource for emergencies and retirement or vacations. You also, though, might watch out because you can be the killjoy of your relationships spontaneous moments or opportunities for pleasantries that make life easier, more romantic and face it---fun.
Romance is delicious. So romance your partner with being great at the chores of life too. Household chores and daily money management or time management are best addressed pragmatically and mutually.
If marriages are viewed as a business that requires good finance management, healthy distribution of money in savings and investments as well as the sound use of money for comfortable daily living, you will both experience that your marriage is truly a partnership. Yes, money management is as much a part of a successful marriage or co-habitating couples as is sex.
Chores for the family and the care of your house also need equal attention from husbands and wives.
Completing chores together can be romantic too if you laugh, touch and respectfully communicate during that time. When chores are done, you might be exhausted and foot and back massages are always good ends to a day of chores—another form of intimacy.
Respect for your partner is built when you see your partner taking responsibility with ease and cheer too and that respect leads to intimacy, sexual expressions and feelings of closeness.
These are key elements of successful relationships. Surprise!! So, be an efficient, organized, reliable partner who can rally around the daily responsibilities and financial demands without being a drain on your partner’s energies. Yes, sharing this world of duties, is the best way to create a dance of intimacy for the two of you. Besides, two doing the duties makes more time for both of you to relax and enjoy the fun of being in-love.